The Unimaginable

The real reason cats can’t have kits with another clan.

There are moments that the words don’t reach
There is suffering too terrible to name
You hold your child as tight as you can
And push away the unimaginable
The moments when you’re in so deep
It feels easier to just swim down
The Hamiltons move uptown
And learn to live with the unimaginable

“Riverlily? Is she ok?” The Tom-cat asks, his fur fluffed out as he stares at the Leader of RushClan, his own leader. “Is she ok?” He asks him, before the leader speaks. “She is fine. You are lucky I’m even allowing her and you to be together.” The Tom-cat nods, before walking into the nursery, his eyes spying his mate, Riverlily, in all her webbed paws glory.
“Riverlily...” He mutters, his eyes soft as he nuzzles his mate, as she looks up at him tiredly. “Windstorm, look at them!” She says, happily.

I spend hours in the garden
I walk alone to the store
And it’s quiet uptown
I never liked the quiet before
I take the children to church on Sunday
A sign of the cross at the door
And I pray
That never used to happen before
Philip, you would like it uptown, it’s quiet uptown
You knock me out, I fall apart


Windstorm looks down at the two kits, his eyes soft as he purrs, his eyes soft and he looks at them. The Tom-kit is like his mother, a grey tabby cat, while the she-cat is just like him, a russet she-cat. He smiles, looking at them. Both have webbed paws and long legs, and he would be willing to bet that they would also either have their mothers lung capacity and swimming or his running skills.
He smiles and speaks. “So we are going with the names we picked?” He asks his mate as she nods. “The She-cat is Rushkit while the Tom is Ripplekit.” She says, happily.

Look at where we are
Look at where we started
I know I don’t deserve you, Eliza
But hear me out
That would be enough
If I could spare his life
If I could trade his life for mine
He’d be standing here right now
And you would smile, and that would be enough

Windstorm watches as his two kits sluggishly play together, their movements slow and uncoordinated. “What’s wrong with them?” He asks the medicine cat as she looks at him. “I don’t know. It could be because of your mutations, perhaps they just aren’t capatible.” She says.
Windstorm shakes his head. “No, it can’t be, they were perfectly healthy before!” He says, staring at them, before looking over at his mate, who is basking in the sun. “What can you do?” He asks the medicine cat, who sighs. “They are in StarClan’s paws, Windstorm.”

I don’t pretend to know
The challenges we’re facing
I know there’s no replacing what we’ve lost
And you need time
But I’m not afraid
I know who I married
Just let me stay here by your side
That would be enough
If you see him in the street, walking by her side
Talking by her side, have pity

Windstorm stares at his mate as they sit together, watching as their kits, their beloved kits, take their final breath. After an amount of worrying, the two kits had fallen prey to the illness and now they would join StarClan. “They will never have warrior names...” Sobs Riverlily as she stares at them, before the RushClan leader speaks. “Yes, they will.”
“I ask my warrior ancestors to look down on these kits. They have been taken away too early and they deserve a chance to be a warrior, even in StarClan. Let StarClan receive them as a warrior. They will be known as Ripplelight and Rushshadow.”

Eliza, do you like it uptown? It’s quiet uptown
Look around, look around, Eliza
(They are trying to do the unimaginable)
There are moments that the words don’t reach
There is a grace too powerful to name
We push away what we can never understand
We push away the unimaginable
They are standing in the garden
Alexander by Eliza’s side
She takes his hand

“Why does StarClan keep doing this to us?” Riverlily sobs as she looks at Windstorm, her eyes looking at the unmarked graves of three kits, Rushshadow, Ripplelight and Saffronkit. She looks at Windstorm and looks down again, her eyes soft as she cries, before Windstorm speaks.
“It’s us. Our... abilities. I don’t think their bodies can handle a mix of our abilities.” He says, before Riverlily growls. “None of this would have happened if I had taken a RippleClan mate!” She growls, looking at Windstorm. “We are no longer mates, Windstorm.” She growls, before she slinks off towards RippleClan as Windstorm looks at the graves, his eyes soft as he looks at them, before his eyes spy three cats sitting above them. He stares at the cats. Rushshadow’s russet brown coat shining with stars and her amber eyes soft as she smiles at her father. Ripplelight’s grey tabby pelt rustling with the wind as his brown eyes soften and he nods at his father. And finally. Saffronkit, who is sitting in between the two, who smiles at her father, her cream coat soft and fluffy. “It wasn’t your fault.”

It’s quiet uptown